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Friday, February 1, 2013

With loving thoughts to Barbara

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Today it is with a very heavy heart that I come.  
Barbara is a dear, dear friend of mine and on January 30, 2013 she lost her husband, Richard.   I first met Barbara at my daughter, Angie's bachelorette party over fourteen years ago.  She is the mother of Angie's sister-in-law, Jackie.   After that night,  Barbara and I became great friends.

As a single mother, I admired Barbara.  She has two children Jackie and Anthony.   She is bubbly and just a sweetheart.   Life has not been easy for her either.    I really don't want to share anything from her past except to say she is a survivor.   And the men in her life were what I call "bastards".   She seemed to only meet men that wanted her as a "trophy", never marriage.   And, in her sweetness, (whatever you call it) ...  she never seemed to realize what kind of men she was drawn to.

And, then she met Richard five years ago and I couldn't have been happier for her.    And, when he asked to marry her ... wow.   He was one of the gentlest, sweetest and most caring men, I have had the honor to call friend.    He made loving Barbara look so easy, because he worshipped the ground she walked on and she has done the same in return.    I know he gave Barbara the stability she had never experienced.   And, in turn ... Barbara just blossomed.    He's funny and just loved life to the fullest.

For five years, I have known that God sent this wonderful man into her life.    He was and is the part of her life that made it whole.   He made her complete.   And, gave her all the happiness she has so justly deserved.

Barbara and Richard
"The day they met"
Barbara and Richard
"Last summer in New Orleans"

I want to include a photo of her beautiful daughter, Jackie
Doesn't she look just like her mother, Barbara
and son, Anthony
Her kids at Mardi Gras, New Orleans

From talking with Jackie last night, she told me that it appears that Richard may have suffered from a deep vein thrombosis.   He had been complaining of severe leg pain.    Jackie said, she had called her mother to find out how Richard was doing and upon talking with her mother and then Richard he said the pain had gone away and "he felt better than he had felt in days".   Approximately thirty minutes later Richard said "my lips feel numb" and went to go to the bathroom.    She said her mother said that Richard called her name and when her mother went to him, he collapsed.   He died in her arms moments later.    To me, it sounds like a pulmonary embolism.  And, I honestly don't know if he'd been to see a doctor. 

This is the reason, my heart hurts so deeply.    I just don't feel that Barbara deserved this.    I am so sad, this just seems like a nightmare.  And I want to somehow go back to January 29th and find out this really, really isn't true.   The funeral is tomorrow and there isn't even anyway for me to go home to be with Barbara.   I have been unable to get through to her on the phone and I just feel so far away.   I have already cried so many tears, but I am crying now again.    I just can't imagine what she is going through.
My wordart is dedicated to Barbara and her wonderful husband, Richard.  Even though, I know she will never read this, hopefully in some small way my prayers will be with her today.  May God wrap her in peace and help her through the days ahead.  It was the only thing I could think to do today to let her know that all my thoughts are with her and more importantly tomorrow.  I love you, Barbara.
Hugs, Sue

1 comment:

Edwina said...

This is so sad. I am thankful she had 5 years with her husband. I only had 4 1/2 years with mine. These are moments that she will treasure always. As I do mine. She will need you after the funeral and everyone else has gone away. That is when the real pain sets in. That is when you need a true friend to lean on. The 1st year is really hard. Stand by her with love. Thank you for sharing this and your sentiments. Edwina Brown